State of the Japanese Club Address

To the peoples of the Japanese Club

I, Dane *****, being President of the Japanese Club by popular vote, do hereby come and make formal request that any dissonant suggestions be made in a proper fashion, to me in person, or in note.  I am usually in the library upstairs, or in Mrs. Paulus’ room.  I invite you to participate in such a manner rather than talking behind my back about me.  Such slander will not be prohibited, and any further abuse of my character will be construed as harassment.  As president of the Japanese club I expect a certain amount of respect from people in the club meeting, as well as from the teacher advisor, especially while I am speaking.

It has come to my attention that my saying that I am a dictator of the Japanese club has caused dissent.  Let my clarify that.  I am the person who dictates what happens at meetings, to my secretary, who writes such things down.  While I find it humorous to address myself in that way, in no way do I directly control what happens in the Japanese club.  That is left to those of you with ideas to suggest them to my associate, Amanda Blanchard, she being the activities manager.

This brings me to my next point.  It has been brought to my attention by Mrs. Maughn, that I have allegedly turned this club into an anime club.  This is by no means true.  Though in Japan there is an anime for every age group and every type of person, I in no way have done anything but promote one of the largest parts of Japanese culture.  In the future, a World War II Veteran will be speaking to us on the Japanese concentration camps in America, and on some of his experiences in France.  There is also a planned sword making presentation I will be giving in the library at a future date.  Remember, this is only the first part of the year and many exciting activities for which you can be a part of will take place.

As a follower of Confucius, I will be granting assignments to committees by merit only.  One could try and bribe me, and I would take the money, but I still wouldn’t give a job to an incompetent worker.  If you wish to be appointed to a task that requires a skill, I will need sufficient proof for you to be there.  I will not, for instance, give a T-shirt drawing assignment to someone who cannot draw.  I do not see what having an incompetent worker would do, except make it harder for progression to occur.

Apparently I have said some demeaning things on the subject of freshmen.  I feel that the things I have said were more directed at friends of mine, but I can see how one may have misconstrued them.  I am more than happy to see the lower classmen doing things to help the Japanese club.  I sincerely apologize for anything I may have said to offend you.  In the Japanese language, when introducing oneself, one will say Yoroshiku onegaishimasu.  Mr. Smith taught me last year that it translated as “Please forgive me for anything that might distress or offend you in the future.”  I sincerely hope that more people will introduce themselves to me in that fashion, so that I may be as forgiving as I hope you are.

As I said earlier, I do not appreciate the demeaning comments I have had the displeasure of hearing about, and wish them to be stopped.  I have not done anything to deserve such heartless slander.  I will try to be more professional, and I hope to see more of you around school, and even more at the Japanese club meetings.  I apologize for this inconvenience that listening to me may have caused, and wish you all a good day.